This blog is becoming a menagerie what with Brian Pigeon and Gus the Fox reporting on our the animal antics of fair city. Now allow me to introduce Larry the Cat from Number 10 Downing street. He may well be the most political animal yet to grace us with his presence. Here he reveals his top spots in London that make him feline fine…
‘Having been living in Number 10 for a little over a year now I’m well aware of the need to escape ones owners (in my case, Posh and Cleggs). Time Out have kindly invited me to share with you my top five spots for cats in this fine city (naturally rodents and Deputy Prime Ministers need not read on).
‘An obvious place to start for two reasons: Firstly, it’s full of pigeons. Tasty, tasty pigeons that nobody’s going to miss. Secondly, there are four huge statues of lions, great role models for cats everywhere. It’s effectively an all you can eat buffet with great interior decoration. The fountains used to be a bit of an issue (cats and water don’t mix) but fortunately the state of the economy means that they’re not switched on much any more (remind me to thank George Osborne for that one).
‘Most people assume the rhyme ‘pussy cat, pussy cat, where have you been?’ was just made up for children. Not so; there is actually a monthly meeting of all cats in the UK at the Queen’s house where we discuss important matters of state with her. That’s why we walk around like we own the place and our owners never have a clue where we are. The story about the Queen loving corgis is just a cover to ensure this massive secret never gets out to the unwashed masses that spend their days reading internet blogs… Bugger.
The Fat Cat Cafe, Mile End
‘Bit of a risk this one – when I first went I was unclear as to whether it was an establishment that sold roast cat in attempt to stay at the forefront of the trendy east London dining scene, or whether it served Whiskas to my chubby brethren. It turned out it was neither, which was probably good news for the Tower Hamlets food inspectors.
Battersea Dogs & Cats Home
‘As I’m always telling Nick Clegg, it’s important to remember where you’ve come from and who got your where you are. Without the good people of the Battersea Cats Home I wouldn’t now be the most famous cat in the country (apart from that cocky bastard on Coronation Street). It’s a plus that there are also hundreds of dogs in cages that I can call names.
New London Theatre
‘In 1981 the best piece of musical theatre ever premièred at this very theatre. ‘Cats’ ran for 21 years. A musical about dogs would run for about 21 seconds (coincidentally that’s how long Eric Pickles has run for in his entire life). At least the Mousetrap is still on…’
Read more from Larry on Twitter at @number10cat