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Five things Giles Coren will never write about in his new Time Out Column

Posted at 1:15 pm, November 4, 2014 in Fun London
Giles Coren © ​Paul Musso

© ​Paul Musso

Good news, Time Out posse: Giles Coren is our new weekly columnist! Known for his acerbic wit, cynical rants at the madness of the world and sophisticated palate, Mr Coren has yet to tell us exactly what he will be writing about, but we do anticipate that it will be LOLs (not his words). In the meantime, we do know five things that will never make an appearance in his column. ‘Game of Thrones’ fans, look away now…

1) ‘Game of fucking Thrones. Appealing though the idea of a teenage nerd video game with inter-special rape essentially is, I have never got through the first five ridiculous minutes of any episode and will not be trying again.’

2) ‘Global warming and how it’s one big fraud invented by lefties to stop right-thinking people driving their cars and going on holiday.’

3) ‘How smoking should be brought back in pubs – or anything else than Nigel Farage wants.’

4) ‘The importance of bringing back bendy buses.’

5) ‘Music. I’m afraid I don’t really get music. And I don’t dance. Ever. Not drunk, not on a pill, not in a foreign country, not dead.’

Pick up your copy of Time Out today to read Giles’ first column or check it out online now.

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