© David John - Flickr: DavenJohn

 
 
 
 

102 cracking things happening in London this December

© Brandon Douglas

© Brandon Douglas

Welcome to December, ladies and gents! You made it. We haven’t got a clue where this year’s gone either, but there’s nothing we can do about it now, so let’s just make the last month of 2014 flippin’ fantastic! It won’t be hard with the sheer volume of festive joy sweeping the capital in the form of Christmas markets, exhibitions, shopping events, pantos and parties – so choose your favourites from the mammoth list below and get planning your most wonderful winter yet…

COOL THINGS TO DO 

Until Dec 3: Sonic Blind Dates, Tate Britain. Sophie Mallett presents her weekly Resonance FM radio show as a live in-gallery edition at Tate Britain. Dig through the library and listen to records, mix tapes and recordings that you’ve never heard before from a specially built studio.

Dec 4: Trafalgar Square Christmas tree lighting, Charing Cross. A huge Christmas tree will herald the arrival of the festive season (someone ought to tell the supermarkets they started early) when it is lit by the Mayor of Oslo, the Mayor of Westminster and the Norwegian Ambassador at 6pm in London’s living room, Trafalgar Square.

Dec 4: A Georgian Christmas at the Geffrye, Hoxton. Explore the Geffrye Museum’s annual Christmas Past exhibition by candlelight at this historical late opening, which will also feature festive music, traditional seasonal entertainment and decoration-making workshops for younger visitors.

Dec 4-7: East London Design Show, Shoreditch. Over 100 independent designers set up stalls in Brick Lane’s Old Truman Brewery, offering Christmas present ideas ranging from the quirky to the luxurious, and include furniture, lighting, ceramics, jewellery, stationery, fashion and accessories.

Dec 4-7: Roman Road Winter Festival, Bethnal Green. The road that runs straight from Bethnal Green to the southern edge of Hackney Wick will get a jolly makeover for this four-day festival of music, shopping, movies and Christmassy fun.

Dec 4-20: The Barry Wise Wise Tour of Soho, Soho Square. Tour guides Barry and Clive are a mine of Soho facts. The only thing is, the accuracy of their information depends almost entirely on how long they spend in the pub before the tour.

Dec 6: A Very Glamorous Christmas, Design Museum. Head to the Design Museum for a drop-in decoration-making workshop, gift wrapping in the shop and chocolate and biscuit tastings. All Voices, Hackney and Islington Community Choir will be performing, providing the perfect soundtrack to your Christmas shopping.

Dec 6: Santacon, secret London location. Have an extra jolly holiday season by dressing up as the man of the moment and running around London at this ‘non-profit, non-political, non-religious and non-sensical’ celebration of Christmas cheer.

Dec 6: Nativity Fun Run, Clapham Common. If the 10km route sounds more exhausting than travelling to Bethlehem at full term then choose the 5km option, which teenagers and children may also join in with.

Dec 6-7: Santa and his Huskies, London Wetland Centre. You may not see any reindeer pulling sleighs this Christmas, but the London Wetland Centre has some handsome huskies ready and waiting to take younger children (aged eight and under) for a spin.

Dec 8: The Godfather Live at the Albert Hall, South Kensington. Francis Ford Coppola’s three times Academy Award winning masterpiece, starring Marlon Brando and Al Pacino, will be shown on the big screen whilst conductor Justin Freer leads a live orchestra performing Nino Rota’s immortal score.

Dec 8-21: More London Christmas Market at the Scoop, London Bridge. The annual More London Christmas Market is back, boasting a winning combination of homemade gifts and delicious food.

Dec 9: Filmageddon’s How the Quiz Stole Christmas, Prince Charles Cinema. Film buffs looking for some festive fun can test their cinematic knowledge at this quiz.

Dec 9-10: Twilight Tours, 18 Stafford Terrace. An evening of Victorian intrigue and drama, during which you’ll be treated to a tour of the atmospheric house, along with mulled wine and mince pies.

Opens Dec 12: Elvis exhibition, The O2. Get ready to be all shook up, London, because we’re getting a taste of Graceland in this exhibition of more than 300 artefacts, some of which have never previously been exhibited outside Memphis.

Dec 12: Danny Elfman’s Music from the Films of Tim Burton at the Albert Hall, South Kensington. Returning for 2014, this live concert sees Danny Elfman’s famous Tim Burton film scores brought to life on stage by a live orchestra.

Dec 12: German Folk Tales, British Museum. University of the Arts London students will transport you to fantasy forests and castles built into the German landscape with a series of workshops and interactive displays inspired by the Brothers Grimm tales at this late night event.

Dec 12, and Dec 23: Dickensian Christmas by Candlelight at the Dickens Museum, Russell Square. The only remaining of Dickens’ London homes is lavishly decorated for Christmas and then lit only with candles for these atmospheric late openings.

Dec 13-Sept 6 2015: Small Stories: At Home in a Dolls’ House, Museum of Childhood. At the V&A Museum of Childhood’s winter exhibition, 12 dolls’ houses from the museum’s extensive collection represent changes in architecture and design over the past 300 years and provide an insight into the lives of the characters that inhabit these delicate creations.

Dec 13: Architecture on the Thames Central Christmas Special with Mulled Wine, Festival Pier. This regular journey down the River Thames gets a festive makeover, with the addition of mulled wine onboard. Starting at Festival Pier, the tour takes in landmarks including Battersea Power Station, The Shard and Tower Bridge before nipping up to Docklands and then heading back to Festival Pier.

Dec 13: Christmas Charm Jewellery Workshop, Farringdon. Black Heart Creatives host this jewellery making workshop where you can create the ultimate festive accessories to wear to Christmas parties, or if you’re feeling generous, gift to a friend.

Dec 14: Tottenham Ploughman Winterfest, Wood Green. Sample the talents of Tottenham’s finest artisan chefs, artists, musicians and craft-makers at the 2014 edition of Tottenham Ploughman Winterfest.

Dec 15: Man vs Santa, The Hand in Hand. This charity challenge asks participants to chow down on as many mince pies as they can manage in just three minutes. As well as a place on the pub wall of fame and eternal gorging glory, the winning gobbler will be given 60 seconds behind the bar to pour as much draught as they can and a local brewery tour for them plus five friends.

Dec 16-22: Olympia Horse ShowOlympia. Four legs good, 400 sets of four legs even better. The equine world’s annual Christmas party hosts world cups, competitions, displays, entertainment and a shopping village.

Dec 17: Wintershall Nativity, Oxford Circus. A specially composed score will accompany this performance, which stars a cast of more than 50, real donkeys and a flock of sheep. The action begins in the piazza outside BBC Broadcasting House where it can be watched for free, but part two will take place inside All Souls Church so you’ll need to book tickets in advance to find out how it ends.

Dec 22: Peter and the Wolf & The Snowman, Cadogan Hall. Comedian Jack Dee will narrate Sergei Prokofiev’s chilling ‘Peter and the Wolf’ accompanied by the Mozart Symphony Orchestra in the first performance of this Christmassy double bill.

Dec 31: New Year’s Eve fireworks, South Bank. Our prodigious pyrotechnics make most other world cities’ look like damp squibs and ever increasing numbers have been turning up to see the spectacle live. So many, in fact, that this year for the first time the show is to be ticketed. The £10 cost will go towards the cost of safety and administration.

cereal killer cafe

Cereal Killer Cafe

FOOD

Dec 4: Pure Taste, Westbourne Grove. The UK’s first gourmet, fine-dining restaurant dedicated to gluten-free and paleo-friendly food.

Dec 5-20: Náttúra, Westbourne Park. This supper club with a team of Michelin-trained chefs will serve a six-course seasonal menu inspired by the renowned Danish restaurant Noma, with many ingredients either local or foraged.

Dec 6-22: Enchanted Nordic Yulefest, Old Street. Constructed in a Shoreditch studio, the Yulefest is split into two parts: brunch and dinner. Both featuring a welcome Christmas cocktail, followed by a four-course Nordic-inspired festive feast from Scandi restaurateurs Fika, plus games, treats and after-grub grooving at the Dance of Candlelight.

Opens Dec 10: Cereal Killer Cafe, Shoreditch. The Brick Lane café, opening on December 10, will sell over 100 international cereals, 20 toppings, 18 flavours of Pop Tarts as well as toast and coffee from Allpress. They will also be kitting it out in vintage cereal boxes and memorabilia.

Dec 12-14: Pig Fest, Stepney City Farm. To highlight the top quality Berkshire pork they rear, Stepney City Farm are throwing a festival to celebrate their hella delicious hogs. A number of events are scheduled throughout the festival including two eight-course tasting evenings called ‘Everything but the Oink’.

Dec 13-14: From Leftovers to Lunch, Borough Market. Chef Tom Hunt hosts this Christmas banquet with Borough Market to highlight the amount of food we waste during the festive season. The culinary craftsman will present a four-course ‘Feast of the Seven Fishes’, based on the Italian tradition, using ingredients that wouldn’t normally be seen as desirable, but still taste absolutely delicious.

Opens Dec tbc: Bad Egg, Moorgate. A new restaurant/bar/brand from Neil Rankin (Smokehouse chef) dedicated to egg dishes.

Opens Dec tbc: Babaji Pide, Shaftesbury Avenue. Babaji Pide is the latest casual dining venue from renowned restaurateur Alan Yau. It’ll be based around Turkish food (Yau’s wife and oft-times business partner, Jale Eventok, happens to be Turkish).

The Hobbit

FILM

Opens Dec 12: The Hobbit. And, finally, Peter Jackson’s epic adventures in the world of Middle-Earth come to a close. This is the third episode in Jackson’s ‘The Hobbit’ trilogy, and the sixth and last film in the series that began with the first ‘The Lord of the Rings’ film back in 2001.

Opens Dec 19: Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb. Larry (Ben Stiller) sets out on a quest to save the museum’s magic from disappearing forever, uniting favourite characters on the way.

Opens Dec 19: Dumb and Dumber To. It’s 20 years since the original ‘Dumb and Dumber’, and now Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels are back – older, probably not wiser, perhaps happy for the cash – for this sequel.

Opens Dec 26: Annie. Directed by Will Gluck and produced by Jay-Z, Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith, this reworking of the 1981 film, tells the story of Annie, an orphan in New York who is taken in by billionaire and mayoral candidate Will Stacks (Jamie Foxx) on the recommendation of his advisers.

Opens Dec 26: Exodus: Gods and Kings. Director Ridley Scott rounds up an army of thespian talent including Christian Bale, Sigourney Weaver, Ben Kingsley, John Turturro and we’re guessing roughly 10,000,000 digital extras. Yes, in this year of ‘Noah’, ‘Pompeii’ and ‘Hercules’, the big Daddy of historical epics is most definitely this megabudget Biblical barnstormer from the ‘Gladiator’ man himself.

Heroes Grotto of Comedy

COMEDY

Dec 3-18: Heroes Grotto of Comedy For two weeks only, ramshackle comedian and promoter Bob Slayer takes over a once-fancypants city restaurant, Throgmortons, and turns it into a pop-up comedy venue with dubious health and safety standards. The place is falling apart, which should make it perfect for gigs from iconoclastic comic Stewart Lee, Arthur Smith (with his Pissed Up Chat Show) and the Weirdos Comedy crew’s alternative panto, ‘A Christmas Tail’.

Dec 2-6: Alfie Brown – Divorced from Reality (and My Wife) Mental illness, paedophilia, slave labour, the word ‘nigger’ – this 27-year-old stand-up doesn’t shy away from contentious topics. But there’s depth and intelligence to Brown’s material. He’s one of the gutsiest stand-ups on the circuit.

Dec 3-5: Ross Noble – Tangentleman Nonsense of the highest order from the motorbike-loving freewheeling Geordie, back at the Hammersmith Apollo for three nights of spontaneous surrealism.

Dec 6-Jan 4 2015: Funz and Gamez The 2014 Foster’s Edinburgh Comedy Awards panel handed the prestigious Panel Prize over to Phil Ellis for this stupidly silly kids’ show. Well, we say it’s for ‘kids’. The grown-ups in the audience are having the most laughs, as wildly inappropriate jokes go over the little’uns heads and they compete in games they have no chance of winning. It really is funz for all the family.

Until Dec 7: UK Jewish Comedy Festival The country’s first ever celebration of Jewish humour is already well under way. Ruby Wax, David Baddiel, Lenny Biege and Arnold Brown, among others, play the week-long fest.

Dec 8-Jan 3 2015: Adam Riches – Adam of the Riches 2011’s Foster’s Award winner’s first show since bagging the gong is another triumph of cunningly crafted, high-energy character comedy that’s big on laughs. Don’t expect to be a passive bystander, Riches’s audience participation is his trademark, and it’s infectiously funny.

Dec 8-20: Nick Helm – Merry Christmas Motherf**kers! The thrillingly unpredictable stand-up (and star of BBC Three’s ‘Uncle’) kicks London hard in the baubles with a pre-Christmas festive treat. Expect gravel-voiced classic rock tunes, bombastically overplayed one-liners and probably some sort of talk about Santa.

Dec 9 and 11-13: A Christmas Tail – Weirdos Alternative Panto The Weirdos gang’s annual alternative panto is fast becoming a Christmas tradition. Adam Larter’s troupe of experimental comics’s third full-length production, ‘A Christmas Tail’, sounds rather fishy, with a cast including John Kearns, Beth Vyse, Pat Cahill and Joz Norris.

Drawn by Light

ART

Opens Dec 2: Drawn By Light, Science Museum. Images from pioneers of photography such as Roger Fenton and Lewis Carroll will be shown alongside modern legends of the genre including Don McCullin, Terry O’Neill and Martin Parr to create a unique look at the stories behind some of photography’s most important images and their creators.

Best of First Thursdays, Dec 4:

Caragh Thuring, Chisenhale Gallery. Image consumption and a viewer’s satisfaction are explored in the London-based artist’s first exhibition in a public gallery.

100 Painters of Tomorrow, Beers Contemporary. To coincide with the release of the same titled Thames & Hudson publication, the gallery presents a condensed showcase of the artists included in the book.

Louisa Mahony: Hourglass Marries Egg, Schwartz Gallery. Flitting between abstraction and figuration, Mahony’s latest oil paintings of obscure objects echo modernist symbolism.

Window Space, 59-63 Whitechapel High Street. Window Space presents its last exhibition this December with an installation by German-Iranian artist Claudia Djabbari.

Opens Dec 5: Bolt, GRAD: Gallery For Russian Arts And Design. In 1931, Shostakovich’s ballet ‘Bolt’ was banned by the Soviet authorities after its premiere. Featuring real hammers and machines, the experimental industrial production is now brought to life in this vibrant exhibition, organised in collaboration with the St Petersburg State Museum of Theatre and Music.

Dec 5-7: The London Illustration Fair, Hoxton. London’s only illustration-dedicated fair returns with a three-day event of artist-led stands, workshops, live DJs and pop-up food stalls.

Dec 6-7: Jarman Award, Whitechapel. Derek Jarman was one of the most forward-thinking, influential video artists of his generation. The provocative filmmaker is the inspiration behind the annual Film London Jarman Award that supports artists working with moving image and who challenge convention, just like the award’s namesake.

Opens Dec 9: Julie Verhoeven, ICA. The ICA’s Fox Reading Room is transformed into a kaleidoscopic installation by the artist and designer. Demonstrating her diverse practice that incorporates illustration, design, film and textiles, Verhoeven creates an extravagant immersive grotto to explore female identity.

Opens Dec 16: The Opinion Makers, Londonewcastle. In communicating the implications and conflict in the world of the artist-curator, this exhibition depicts a rich spectrum of formal, abstract and installation pieces that feature in juxtaposed pairs. Each set depicts one piece by an artist-curator, together with a work by an artist of their choice.

 Edward Scissorhands

THEATRE

Opens Dec 2: Edward Scissorhands, Sadler’s Wells. Christmas isn’t Christmas without one of super-choreographer Matthew Bourne’s vivid extravaganzas – this is the first revival for his ravishing 2008 adaptation of Tim Burton’s film and well worth a look.

Opens Dec 3: Treasure Island, National Theatre. Hopes are high for Bryony Lavery’s adaptation of Robert Louis Stevenson’s classic tale of derring do, which stars ‘Doctor Who’ man Arthur Darvill as villainous pirate Long John Silver.

Opens Dec 5: City of Angels, Donmar Warehouse. The hottest musical in town this Christmas isn’t in any of the big West End theatres, but the Donmar Warehouse – this ambitious film noir spoof featuring ‘The Light Princess’ star Rosalie Craig as a femme fatale sold out instantly, but fresh tickets will go on sale each Monday of the run, and for two weeks before.

Opens Dec 9: Golem, Young Vic. It’s been four years since cult theatre company 1927 had its last London premiere. But it almost doesn’t feel like it – the stunning semi-animated black comedy ‘The Animals and Children Took to the Streets’ has become a tinsel-free Christmas staple, first at BAC and then at the National Theatre. Judging from the stunning stills, we can expect something similar from ‘Golem’, a lavish satire about man’s increasing dependence on machines.

Dec- Jan: Mother Goose, Hackney Empire. Hackney Empire’s panto will always be London’s favourite, and that goes double this year: ‘Mother Goose’ is both a restaging of the theatre’s acclaimed 2008 show, and the return of the man who received an Olivier nod for it: Clive Rowe, London’s greatest dame, returns after a three-year absence to regain his throne.

Winter Village

SHOPPING

Christmas markets

Dec 5-7: Winter Village, St John-at-Hackney Church. Even those who find Christmas shopping more fun than opening their own presents will have one person on their list they find a challenge, so markets full of contemporary crafts, locally made art and unique edible treats like this one are a gift in themselves.

Dec 5-7: Etsy House, Great Newport Street. We’ve lost many an hour trawling Etsy for cute handmade stuff, so we’re happy to hear that this Christmas, the online marketplace is heading to London for its first UK pop-up shop.

Dec 6: Hackney Fleamas Market, Abney Hall. Stock up on everything you need to make your life look more like it fell out of an interior design magazine from decades gone by at this festive version of the regular vintage market.

Dec 6-7: White Christmas Fair, Testbed1. More than 40 stalls will make up this gift fair where you’ll find plenty of delicious treats to stock your winter larder with as well as handmade jewellery, greetings cards, wreaths and even real Christmas trees.

Dec 6-7: Crafty Fox Christmas Market, The Dogstar. The family-run craft market for emerging designers and makers returns to the Dogstar for their annual festive event, with over 40 handpicked stalls selling a range of jewellery, prints, homewares, clothing and things that will make your house even more lovely than usual.

Dec 12-22: Barbican Xmas Market, Barbican. The Barbican hosts ten days of seasonal shopping, with 35 independent designers, makers and artisans setting up shop in the foyers. With vintage and designer clothes, arts and crafts, jewellery, books and toys all available, it’s a great option for cultural Christmas shopping.

Dec 13: Dusty Fingers Winter Wonderland, The Round Chapel Centre for Performing Arts. Dusty Fingers are bringing a touch of Deutschland to Hackney for the most wonderful time of the year, setting up a Christmas market in Clapton’s beautiful Round Chapel.

Dec 14: Xmas Craftacular, Islington Metal Works. Taking place over two floors of the Islington Metal Works, this celebration of all things crafty has an impressive 70 stall line-up, including paper-cut pioneer Rob Ryan and Pugs not Drugs illustrator Gemma Correll, alongside a whole host of up-and-coming designer makers.

Shopping events and pop-ups

Dec 5-7: Spin Xmas, Shoreditch. On your bikes! Spin London is taking over Shoreditch’s Rochelle School just in time for Christmas, and it’s heaven for cycling aficionados, featuring dozens of bike related brands under one roof.

Dec 6: Wasted Chic, Shoreditch. Popping up at Shoreditch bar and restaurant McQueen for an afternoon will be 30 independent designers, selling clothing, lingerie and accessories. Thanks to a £100 cap, the prices aren’t eye-watering, either.

Dec 11-16: LCF College Shop, Soho. Fancy grabbing a one-off piece from the next big thing? London College of Fashion’s pop-up College Shop is back for its fourth year, in a new location at the heart of Carnaby.

Dec 14: Bethnal Green Vintage Fair, York Hall. The UK’s largest travelling vintage marketplace returns to Bethnal Green, with over 40 leading vintage traders on board. You can expect up to 75 percent off the typical sales price on an array of fashion, homewares, accessories and collectables.

Until Dec 21: Kit Neale Pop Up, Hoxton. Nab up to 70 percent off past season collections at this beautifully presented pop up shop from menswear designer, Kit Neale. Open every weekend until Dec 21.

Sample sales 

Dec 3-4: Erdem Sample Sale, The Music Room. Elbows at the ready. Fashion week favourite Erdem’s having another studio clear out, so prepare yourselves for some blooming lovely bargains.

Dec 8: London Designer Sample Sale, The Music Room. The line up at this unmissable sample sale reads like a roll call for the best of London’s design talent. Expect up to 75 percent off past season pieces from Jonathan Saunders, Richard Nicoll, Marios Schwab,Roksanda, JW Anderson and many more.

Dec 11-13: Preen Sample Sale, The Music Room. From a tiny shop on Portobello Road to the catwalk at New York Fashion Week, Preen provide the template for ‘London brand done good.’ Prices start from as low as £10 for past season pieces at this three-day clear out.

Dec 12-13: Peter Jensen Sample Sale, Peter Jenson Studio. At the latest sample sale from Danish-born design supremo Peter Jensen, you’ll find discounts of up to 90 percent off, with prices starting from as low as a tenner.

Sinkane

MUSIC

Dec 1: Sinkane, Oslo. To an extent, Sinkane is the work of one man – ex-Yeasayer member Ahmed Gallad. He plays the funky bass lines and drum parts and he’s the one on the flute and crooning in a silky smooth falsetto. But of course live, he needs some help, and that’s when he calls on the talents of fellow former Yeasayer dude Jason Trammell on drums, jazz guitarist Mikey Freedom Hart and bassist Mike Montgomery.

Dec 3Sun Kil Moon, St John-at-Hackney Church. Singer-songwriter Mark Kozelek – renowned for his pensive, heartbreaking folk-inflected songs for Red House Painters – plays to support the haunting ‘Benji’, the latest album released under his Sun Kil Moon pseudonym.

Dec 9: John Coltrane’s ‘A Love Supreme’, Unon Chapel. A troupe of contemporary jazz and world music heavyweights ‘re-envision’ Trane’s transcendental masterpiece, commemorating 50 years to the day since the sax saint’s original was recorded in a single session.

Dec 10: AMP Collected, ICA. Mellow, golden age-style UK hip hop outfit Hawk House perform tonight alongside producer and singer George Maple, who takes her cues from the Jessie Ware dubstep and R&B-infused school of songwriting.

Dec 13: Bombay Bicycle Club, Earls Court. My, haven’t these four young men come a long way? It seems only yesterday that they were fresh-faced 16-year-olds bashing out melodic, winsome indie at Nambucca. Now they’re following an adventurous Number One record, ‘So Long, See You Tomorrow’, with their biggest home town show ever at Earls Court.

Dec 13: Anna Calvi, St John-at-Hackney Church. Anna Calvi’s second album ‘One Breath’ made this year’s Mercury Prize shortlist, and she’s celebrating her double-whammy with a special show at the gorgeous St John-at-Hackney church.

Dec 15-17: Manic Street Preachers, Roundhouse. After touring two albums in as many years, it’s probably about time the Manics had a break. Instead the Welsh titans are embarking on another big tour, this time performing their awe-inspiring, bleakly brilliant 1994 album ‘The Holy Bible’ all the way through as a twentieth anniversary salute.

Dec 21-23: The Cure, Eventim Apollo Hammersmith. Robert Smith’s seminal gloom-pop combo play one of their sporadic London gigs, which generally last upwards of two hours.

hot tub cinema

NIGHTLIFE

Dec 2-18: Hot Tub Xmas Cinema, Shoreditch. Don’t say you didn’t expect it. We’ve had Hot Tub Cinema, Hot Tub Halloween Cinema, Pillow Cinema and now Hot Tub Christmas Cinema. It’s the logical next step in warm watery world domination from the ever-savvy HTC crew.

Dec 4-20: Palace of the Snow Queen, secret location. This full-on festive pop-up combines cabaret, circus, fine dining and even a bit of late night/early morning partying – all of which sounds exactly what we want for Christmas.

Dec 5: Turntables, Hackney. Top London party crew Percolate head to Turntables tonight for a very welcome session. Expect all kinds of house and techno bliss, plus a bit of disco and some funkier flavours. These guys are seasoned pros behind the decks, so expect top tunes to be rinsed out all night long.

Dec 6: Rhythm Parlour, Peckham. Get your beard trimmed while you soak up some disco bliss at pop-up musical barber shop The Rhythm Parlour, set in Rye Wax Records in Peckham’s Bussey Building.

Dec 12: Office Xmas Party with Skream, The Old Queen’s Head. Superstar DJs are waaay too cool for Christmas, right? Wrong. Beat genius Skream, dubstep don Artwork and D&B master Die are hosting a cheerfully cheap ‘Office Christmas Party’.

Dec 19: Ed Banger Xmas Party, XOYO. French label Ed Banger get all festive, unleashing the usual delightful flurry of electro, house, disco and breaks, in what the crew are calling a Christmas hoedown.

Until Dec 19: Night Tales, Old Street. Ace pop-up cocktail, music and food party Night Tales is back! This time, they’re taking over a vast (10,000 sq/ft) Shoreditch car park for a seven-week run, featuring wild gardens, private chalets, three new concept bars, log fires and a huge canopy to protect from evil winter vibes.

Until Dec 21:Grotto Outre, Old Street. This festive winter-pop, taking place at Shoreditch event space Red Gallery, features a different kind of fun on every night of the week, all the way from its launch on Nov 28 right up until it closes shop for Christmas on December 21.

Until Dec 21: Paperworks, Elephant and Castle. After a storming summer session, pop-up happening The Paperworks is back for a winter extravaganza with yet more top tunes, art, street food, cocktails, film screenings, winter market offerings and other general fun.

Dec-Jan 2015: Skate at Somerset House, Charing Cross. The series of late-night DJ-led skate sessions at the picturesque ice rink returns for another year, as part of the wider Skate at Somerset House programme. Choose a time to skate and soak up the sounds of top DJs, who’ll be spinning house, techno, disco, garage, grime and much more.

Best Winterville clubbing

Dec 5, 12, 19: Winterville Spiegeltent: Bugged Out Free For All, Victoria Park. Expect all the usual Bugged Out shenanigans, including ace resident DJs and special guests spinning house, disco, techno funk and party jams, plus a bit of Christmas glamour to boot.

Dec 6, 13, 20: Winterville Spiegeltent: Guilty Pleasures, Victoria Park. Sean Rowley’s uber-fun club night Guilty Pleasures is heading the Spiegeltent at Winterville for a series of weekly Saturday parties.

Dec 14: Winterville Spiegeltent: Horse Meat Disco, Bears on Ice, Victoria Park. Our favourite funky maestros roll up to the temporary winter wonderland for a Christmas extravaganza.

Dec 21: Winterville Spiegeltent: Sink The Pink – Camp as Christmas, Victoria Park. Sink The Pink, the zaniest, funnest, great big epic win of a club night, is setting up camp at Winterville’s Spiegeltent, which can only be a very good thing indeed.

Want even more Christmassy goodness? Here’s even more great stuff happening in December. See ya!

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