London restaurants are going nuts for Christmassy dishes, but some of them sound a little… odd. We tried five of the most unusual to see if they were crackers or turkeys.
Hawksmoor Turkey Nuggets
What is it? A meaty mix of turkey, pigs in blankets and stuffing, wrapped around a four-cheese sauce, then breadcrumbed, deep-fried and served with a pot of cranberry ketchup.
Price £7. Only available from the bar at Hawksmoor Spitalfields.
How is it? Given that it’s a Hawksmoor dish, this was never really going to be anything other than excellent. It’s meaty. It’s cheesy. It’s deep-fried. It’s basically the kind of artery bothering Christmas food that Bad Santa would make. We totally love it.
Herman Ze German Christmas Currywurst
What is it? An apple and onion bratwurst, topped with curry sauce, a cinnamon-and-clove spice mix and chunks of spekulatius: a German Christmas cookie.
Price £6.45 with fries.
How is it? This curry sausage’s texture might be smoother than an elf’s arse, but concept-wise, it sounds more like the ‘Nightmare Before Christmas’ than festive fun times. Until you take your first bite. It’s sweet and rich and lovely and the cinnamon makes it seem as festive as a family argument. Sod the first Noel. This year we’re all about the wurst Noel.
United Ramen Turkey Ramen
What is it? Noodles, turkey, cranberry sauce, ginger-and-soy sprouts, fried sage and carrots in a turkey and chicken bone broth.
How is it? Sounds awful, tastes nice. The dollop of cranberry lends a lovely sweetness to a broth that’s oily with dark turkey meat. The carrots are soaked in mirin, soy and rice vinegar and the sage is all crispy and buttery. The only question is: is ramen Xmas food? The answer to which is: yes. After all, you have to spend ages prepping stock. And what’s more Christmassy than stocking?
Meatliquor XXXmas Burger
What is it? A sausage and stuffing patty, topped with roast turkey, crispy bacon, cranberry sauce and gravy.
How is it? Unbelievably good. Essentially a Christmas meal that’s sneakily disguised inside a burger, so that you almost don’t realise until it’s oozing rich gravy into your mouth and stuffing it with succulent turkey and deliciously crispy bacon. Absolutely delicious. And so festive it makes you want to scream: ‘Quick! It’s the Queen’s Speech! Turn the telly off!’
Wahaca’s Roasted Sprout Mole
What is it? A handful of sprouts, topped with feta cheese, toasted almonds and a spicy mole sauce.
Price Available as part of Wahaca’s four-course Mexmas menu (£19.50 per person).
How is it? Odd. Very odd. Sprouts with feta we could maybe go for. Possibly we could turn a blind eye to the incongruity of the toasted almonds. But then tossing it all in a mole sauce so angry it could play Scrooge in ‘A Christmas Carol’? Just wrong. And not just because spicy sprouts are unlikely to render your bum a fragrant proposition the next day.
Take a look at which London restaurants are open on Christmas day.